Time for Change
As I explained in the Gambling Triangle Video, TIME is one of the three elements you need to Gamble. I hope that you are starting to see that when you stop a single side of the Triangle you are having benefits – just think how strong it would had all three stopped!
When you live and breath gambling for a long time, it becomes your best friend. I am sure it has become all consuming, leaving you little or no time to do anything else. With a habit so ingrained, it is not going to be easy for you to suddenly stop! However your ability to live a different life happens naturally, when you replace it with other habits and activities, and your other blocking systems are in place.
Problem gambling is stimulated by:
- Poor time management skills
- Poor social interaction skills
- Low boredom and frustration thresholds
- Limited attention span
- Inability to delay gratification
Instead of the fake happiness that gambling gave you, by retraining your brain, you will once again be able to find happiness in other things.
Consider the pleasures you used to enjoy doing, maybe you used to like fishing, reading, gardening or playing golf … Re-engage in those activities that once brought you pleasure. While you have been in your gambling bubble, you have missed out on so many things. Don’t let Gambling continue to win! Contact your friends, maybe family you haven’t seen for awhile, arrange to visit and go out again. Be present! You are worth it.
It may take time for you to adjust from the highs and lows of gambling, to the routines of everyday life again. But it will be worth it.
Long term strategies:
- Time structured training
- Replacing gambling with other activities
- Addressing your losses
When you are ready to change, doing the same old habits is not an option!
Changing habits will 100% change your life
Find your motivation for change.
|What will your life be like if you change?|
|What are the repercussions if you don’t?|
Remember what I said about the motivation: what motivates you, fear or vision?
Gambling is an automatic response to an urge. Therefore, next time you get the urge to gamble – respond differently!
- make a phone call
- go out – take a walk
“I am sure you can think of many more things to do. One of my clients used to wash all their clothes, even the clean ones, so they had nothing to wear and couldn’t go out!”Nuno
New habit # 1 – Don’t give into negative thoughts
The thoughts in our heads, are sometimes painful and very loud. Especially when we are trying to resist the urge to gamble. When this happens, the best thing to do, is change your physical surroundings. Take a walk or go for a run in the park, meet up with a friend.
When you engage in something other than your negative cycle of thinking, you will think more clearly.
New habit # 2 – Try keeping a Journal
Start putting some of your feelings down on paper. First thing in the morning is a good time to write in your journal. Now read your thoughts back to yourself, say them out loud. Are these feelings you are having negative or positive? Often we don’t realise how negatively we our thinking.
Overtime negativity becomes a habit, by putting a voice to them, we can start to see areas to focus on and change.
Patterns that have been in place for years won’t be undone overnight, so I want you to be compassionate and patient with yourself. As you work through them, you will find each day becomes easier. Once you do that, success is no longer a possibility, it becomes an inevitability.
Today’s Task: Consider the pleasures you used to enjoy doing, maybe you used to like fishing, reading, gardening or playing golf … Re-engage in those activities that once brought you pleasure.
While you have been in your gambling bubble, you have missed out on so many things. Don’t let Gambling continue to win! Contact your friends, maybe family you haven’t seen for awhile, arrange to visit and go out again. Be present! You are worth it.
Write in your Journal
- Think of past times and activities you would you like to replace gambling with.
- Write down any negative thoughts you are having – beside each one think of a strategy to combat each one; For example – “I have an hour until my appointment, I could have a quick gamble!” – Instead replace it with ” I know, I will get some fresh air, walk in the park sit on a bench with an ice cream!” Start to use these strategies whenever the need arises.
- Plan a date night – time with friends, your children
Having completed the above, and for any other tasks today that require a follow-up, write down the DUE DATE on your calendar.
If this task was for you, then well done!
You’re on the right path to putting a stop to the devastation that gambling has been causing in your life and to those around you.
If you’re rebuilding the trust with those that have been affected by your gambling activities, don’t forget to tell them what you have been doing to stop your gambling. Even better, why not ask them to help and / or witness what you have done and put in place.